Weddings

If you know me, I have an odd obsession with wedding blogs not because I'm secretly planning my own wedding but I just love all the detail and attention that goes into a wedding. 

Each wedding is one of a kind and represents the couple, their story, and all the people who made them who they are up to that day.

Some links that I love, by the water, on a cliff, their story, and a cute ceremony.

"At the end, when you're looking back instead of forward, you want to believe that you made the most of what life gave you. You want to believe that you're leaving something good behind. You want it all to have mattered."

Women leaders in research

I attended a retreat for my student training program and we were all seated along a round table in a conference room. Looking around, I noticed how many men occupied leadership roles and were at the top of their professions while women were more likely to take on coordinator and "behind the scene" roles.

“We are a generation of young women who were told we could do anything and instead heard that we had to be everything.” - Courtney E. Martin

As women we are expected to not only balance work and personal life but to excel in all areas. When I first started university, I wanted to be a world renown research scientist in my field, teach and mentor future scientists, and travel the world promoting my research. Closer to the end rather than the beginning my studies, I no longer feel this way. Priorities are constantly changing and I'm pulled to wanting to build my CV, to fostering and building personal relationships, to adding stamps to my passport, and so forth.

"Despite the significant strides the feminist movement has made over the last 50 years, women still shoulder a greater caregiving burden than men, not only as mothers, but also in their other roles as daughters, wives, sisters, and friends."

This article speaks to this.

Rediscovering your own backyard

Kingston, Ontario

Nice Girls Don't Get the Corner Office

This book has some really good tips for women entering the work force!
Some that I particularly liked.

18. Not asking questions for fear of sounding stupid - asking a legitimate question to ensure understanding is mare a sign of confidence than of ignorance. Asking yourself the simple question, “will the answer apply to only me?” should help you decide whether you should ask it.

28. Offering a limp handshake – a handshake is how you make your first impression upon initially meeting someone. You do want your handshake to convey the message; I’m someone to be taken seriously.

38. Putting work ahead of your personal life – having activities and people outside of work that are important to you helps you remain positive and productive. It’s a fallacy that you have to give up your life to have a successful career.

39. Letting people waste your time – being nurturing and kind is not mutually exclusive of being protective of your time. Think about how you let others take advantage of your time.

47. Using only your nickname or first name – the diminutive of anything diminishes importance. It’s a small but significant difference. Using only your first name relegates you, once again, to a childlike status. The combination of your first and last names moves you to adulthood.

48. Waiting to be noticed – make sure that you know your value and that you communicate it to others.

52. Giving away your ideas – Women often let their ideas get stolen rather than calling attention to the source. Every time you give away an idea you give away your self-respect. Do this enough times and yours self confidence begins to dwindle immeasurably. Your ideas have value in the marketplace.

56. Couching statements as questions - This is a common mistake women make – asking a question as a safe way of expressing an idea without being perceived as too direct or pushy. By asking a question instead of making a statement we relinquish ownership of and the outcomes for our ideas.

60. Apologizing - Apologizing for unintentional. Low-profile, non-egregious errors erodes our self-confidence and, in turn, the confidence others have in us. It’s a conflict-reducing technique, but one that makes you look like you’re at fault when you’re not.

72. Failing to pause or reflect before responding. A pregnant pause is a powerful tool to add to your communication skill set. A pause before speaking does several things. It conveys a message of thoughtfulness about what you’re about to say. It generates interest on the part of the listener. A pause and the ensuing silence give others the impression you’re self-confident. And they give you time to put your thoughts into a concise framework.

82. Grooming in public – no matter how discreet you think you are, grooming in public is noticed and mentally logged by those around you. Real women avoid PDG (public display of grooming).

83. Sitting in meetings with your hands under the table. In meetings, lean forward slightly, resting your forearms on the table with hands lightly clasped. Not only does it make you look more involved in the conversation, but it also puts you in a perfect position to gesture when needed.

Update

Sky Lantern Festival, Taiwan

I miss traveling. The lack of routine and repetition, the adventure, and being amazed by a new culture and way of life. Yet when I'm traveling, I miss home. I miss you but I have to keep busy.

I really want to do an Asia trip next summer, maybe by myself. We had a discussion of backpacking alone over pho yesterday.. it would be scary but I would be really excited.

It's been almost a month back in Toronto. I have been extremely homesick but am slowly falling in love again with Toronto. School has been a lot more challenging yet extremely rewarding. It has changed my view on what it means to be Canadian, our health care system, and most importantly, has made me question my passion for the field.

There are two ways to live: You can either live as if nothing's a miracle or live as if everything's a miracle.

summertime

Stampede with my sister and bil

OLP!

Fireworks from the grandstand show

Look at all em cowboy hats :)

Show in the Corral - apparently this was from Cavalia?

Not pleased with my 'Japanese' dog.. nothing like Japadog but then again I wasn't too impressed with japadog in Van

Blue's Club!!

AMAZING sweet potato pie with icing and roasted pecans and a po boy (sp?) - spicy catfish. Delicious.

Inglewood love.

Downtown Calgary at night.. this is our updated ctrain stations.

Cascade mountain.. we made it to the second peak (right in the middle).. longest ten(?) hours of my life..

LOOK AT THE ANIMAL!

Gorgeous, gorgeous view. Worth all the sweat and fear.

That is Banff down there... all photos unedited.

I'm smiling but scared sh*tless.. those rocks were killer to climb.

I believe this was the peak we just climbed.. from the previous photo..

HI MOLLY! First time at an off lease dog park :). That white bag has chicken feet in it.

My battle scars from the hike.. this does not need to be enlarged.

This summer is coming to an end.. I am a lot sadder than I normally am about returning back to school. 

I am having an amazing summer, Calgary you have been very good to me.

family

 

For those that know me, family is very important to me. I have always been close to my entire family, we have deep conversations over the dinner table, provide relationship/life/career/fashion/any advice whether or not the other party wants it, we are extremely blunt with one another, and we care for each other unconditional (it doesn't always seem that way though).

This summer has been an amazing period of time for me to reconnect with family, sure I talk to them regularly but those little daily moments are missed. I miss our late night Mickey D runs and conversations with everyone cuddled up under the covers. However, there have been a lot of big fights which isn't too surprising. There are always good and bad moments. Moments where I want to cry and just get out of here as soon as possible and moment where I want to cry because I'm missing out on THIS life. This version of my life.

It's been a bit difficult to figure out where I want to be, I'm realizing people have their own lives and are starting their new lives and families, and whether or not I'm here.

I guess the point of this post is that, at the end of the day, when it comes down to it, your family will always be there. I can go around the world and pursue whatever dream I want, and I can always come back to family. However, I can't expect to always come back to what I left and pick up from there.

“Our most basic instinct is not for survival but for family. Most of us would give our own life for the survival of a family member, yet we lead our daily life too often as if we take our family for granted.” -Paul Pearshall

Just look up, we are both under the same sky.

Reached the half way point to being over this.. it's taking a long time. Clubbing isn't so fun, meals don't taste so great, bodies of water aren't so beautiful, the worst part is feeling more lonely than I was before. Every time I'm in a bad mood or having a not so good day, I think of how I could just pack my bags and fly across the ocean.

I'm stuck in limbo, between the past and future.

wonder with my wonderwall

Grand Canyon National Park, Arizona, a photo by landscape photography - sebastien-mamy.fr on Flickr.

And all the roads that lead you there are winding
And all the lights that light the way are blinding

Second attempt to see one of the world`s wonder this Christmas, this time with my wonderwall of a family.

Like all great travelers, I have seen more than I remember, and remember more than I have seen - Benjamin Disraeli

hits too close to home

One's destination is never a place, but a new way of seeing things. - Henry Miller

 

The Best Times You’ll Have With Your College Roommate

 

You’ll help each other move things. You’ll haul heavy furniture up the stairs and accidentally drop parts and pieces; exhausted you’ll leave the coffee table on the porch and give the couch a final push to flop it over right side up before you collapse onto it, sweating, and crack open some beers. The coffee table will stay out there all night.

You’ll throw parties together — house parties, theme parties, impromptu dance parties. You’ll make dinner together and it’ll be an event, getting your schedules to synch up for one night a week, and it’ll always be something warm and comforting, like chicken tortilla soup or goulash or enchiladas. You’ll go grocery shopping together and split the bill; you’ll front them money when they need it without a thought because you know they’d do the same for you.

You’ll make a beer pong table out of milk crates and a door taken off its hinges; sometimes you’ll play wine pong or whiskey pong when you’ve run out of beer. You’ll play board games in the living room, go out for midnight walks when you’re both restless, you’ll consider getting a dog or cat or both and you’ll do it, or maybe you’ll just compromise and get a houseplant. You’ll take blurry pictures together and put them up on the fridge, ask each other’s opinions about what to wear for a first date or a night out. You’ll meet each other’s girlfriends, boyfriends, parents and one night stands; you’ll see all these people and discuss them in the kitchen the next day.

You’ll stay in and play Super Smash or watch 300 or Golden Girls reruns on a dim snowy weeknight with mugs of tea or Irish coffee or hot cocoa; you’ll pull at the blanket on opposite ends of the couch. You’ll sit with them on the deck, the steps, the roof, passing a 40 back and forth and not talking. You’ll sit there with them under the stars and somehow feel lightened, on the edge of the world with nowhere to go but up. You will have comfortable silence.

You’ll get high together and have conversations that change you, conversations that start small and last accidental hours. You’ll talk to them about things you can’t talk about with your significant other, not even your best friend; you don’t know why but somehow it’s different. You’ll talk about things you can only talk about with someone who’s close to you without being too close.

You’ll take care of each other after fights and debilitating break-ups. You’ll go to the bar with them on a random Tuesday because they’re sad and then you’ll carry each other home, laughing and stumbling the whole way, supporting each other though neither of you can really walk. You’ll lie on the couch together hungover, again on opposite ends, occasionally picking up your phones and alternately getting up for snacks or more Gatorade. Miserable but not alone.

You’ll be there for each other for things. You’ll drive each other to pharmacy, the hospital, the DMV; you’ll knock on their door to check if they’re dying of heartbreak or if they want grilled cheese. You’ll never feel completely alone because you’ll always have someone to talk to, if even for a brief exchange about the electric bill. You’ll feel content and supported knowing that, living in a rickety sh-thole where the oven works only sometimes and it’s 2000 degrees in the summer, with someone who is just as confused and clueless and young as you are, you’ve found a place to call home.

Update

Quick update of the last few weeks

I graduated!

Got my tan on at Woodbine.

Night out with my YYZ & YYC cousins! (I look horrible in this photo.. my sister looks good though)

Celebrated my homefry Jen's birthday! Never too old for krazy straw bottles

Walking home from the train.

Canada Day with my mom

More tanning at Sikome Lake

"The use of traveling is to regulate imagination by reality, and instead of thinking how things may be, to see them as they are." - Samuel Johnson